Before Halo Wars, there was Herzog Zwei, a proto-console-RTS that was far ahead of its time.  Sure it was extremely limited when compared to its current-day brethren, but what do you want?  For crying out loud you were a jet that could transform into a robot!  That’s gotta be worth something, right?

In the single-player campaign (there was a split-screen, versus option), you’re a huge red jet/robot operating out of a main base, tucked away in the corner of one the eight varied maps.  There are smaller bases that fan out in the level.  By sending in infantry you can take over the base and use it to generate and pick up units.  It’s standard-issue stuff, but it works, which isn’t bad for 1989.

The units include tanks, anti-air, boats, motorcycles, supply trucks, infantry and huge missile-firing turrets.  Each have a production cost, which is deducted from whatever you’ve got in the bank, which builds faster with the more bases you’ve captured. First player to blow up the opponent’s base wins.

And there you have it.

The learning curve isn’t steep and is actually pretty addictive once you get into your groove.  Plus, the AI is a total dick so it’s fun to mess around with him.  I used to totally decimate his outposts then surround his base with turrets and sit back and watch him endlessly get nuked and respawn and get nuked again.  On retrospect, I suppose I was a very lonely child.

@#$ you Blue Jet and the horse you rode in on!

While the opposing CPU was fun to torment, the friendly AI didn’t do much to help.  Those supply trucks were NOT interested in supplying my units, so I’d have to build intricate enclosures of missle batteries to keep them from riding off into a lake .  Also, the game predictably suffered from cataclysmic slowdown as the number of units increased.

Overall, this was an underappreciated, progressive and, most importantly, fun little gem that largely went unnoticed, save for the gratified few that managed to stumble into its prehistoric-RTS riches.

Vintage Verdict: Not Guilty!  Schnell!  Schnell!